101 Ways to Eat Beetles

Originally written by TigerLover, with additions from fans



1. Fried

2. Puréed

3. On Pizza

4. On Cookies

5. On Top Of Spaghetti... all covered with cheese!

6. Sautéed

7. In Cake

8. In Pie

9. On Top Of Eye Scream

10. Liquefied (beetle... juice?)

11. Beetle Candy

12. Mixed With Nuts

13. Mixed In Popcorn

14. Chocolate Covered

15. Sun-dried

16. Moldy

17. Soaked In Broth

18. Buttered

19. Pickled

20. Smashed

21. Crushed

22. Crumbled

23. Stuffed (You gotta use the really big ones for that.)

24. Battered (Like fish and chips)

25. Baked

26. Boiled

27. Stewed

28. Glazed

29. Peeled (That's when ya pluck their little wings off. Hehehehee!)

30. Roasted

31. Beetles Cordon Bleu (Jacques taught me that one.)

32. Stir-Fried

33. Grilled

34. Braised

35. Broiled

36. In Soup

37. Beetle Chowder

38. Beetles In Cream Sauce

39. Beetles In A Red Wine Sauce (Yummy!)

40. In Chili

41. Beetle Dumplings (Just like Ma used to make.)

42. Beetle Pot Pie

43. Beetle Roll-ups

44. Sweet And Sour Beetles

45. Dipped In Salsa

46. Chopped Up As Relish

47. Barbecued

48. Beetle Kabobs

49. Spicy Beetle Wings (Those make your eyes water, Babes!)

50. Beetles Teriyaki

51. Diced

52. Chopped

53. Julienne (That's got nothin' to do with my 4th book!!)

54. Blanched (Again, has nothin' to do with my 4th book!)

55. On Crackers (They make a great paste!)

56. In Salad (Only thing that makes 'em taste good -- bluck!)

57. Over-Easy (Gotta crack 'em open for that one.)

58. Slimy

59. Dead

60. Alive

61. Mashed

62. Beetles Benedict

63. Beetle Calzones

64. Beetle Meatballs

65. Beetles a-la King

66. Beetles Cacciatore

67. Grated

68. Mixed with that really neat purple stuff that I found under my bed!

69. Hahahah--hahahhaha, That's a good one! HA!

70. Slivered Up Into Really Tiny Bits And Used As Toppings For Just About Anything (YUMMY!!!)

71. Simmered In Beetle Sauce (Yeah, Yeah...beetles In beetle sauce, I know it's redundant, but it's GREAT!)

72. Beetle Pretzels (Don't ask, I don't know how they do it either.)

73. Beetle Popsicles

74. Beetle Hot Dogs

75. Beetleburgers

76. Beetle Chips

77. Trail Mix -- consists of : Beetles, Grubs, Gnats (Sorry, Dad), Cockroaches, Leeches, and Ants

78. Beetle Brownies

79. Beetle Pancakes

80. Beetle Waffles

81. Beetle Cereal

82. Frozen Beetle TV Dinners (Yeah, they make those!)

83. Fried Green Beetles (As opposed to fried green tomatoes -- YUCK!)

84. Drained And Crunchy

85. Soggy

86. Beetle Cheese

87. Beetle Donuts

88. Cajun Beetles

89. Beetle Gumbo

90. Beetles N' Bits (One of my favorite snacks! I don't think ya wanna know what the bits are made of.)

91. Beetle Sausage

92. Sloppy Beetles (I think you living people call 'em ''Sloppy Joe's'', but who'd wanna eat a Joe?)

93. Beetle Burritos

94. Beetle Pudding

95. Beetles O-rotten (That'd be Au gratin to you livin' folks.)

96. Beetle Fries

97. Beetle Jell-o

98. Beetle Sandwiches

99. Beetles Alfredo

100. Beetle Sauce (It's kind'a like apple sauce.)

101. Plain


*ADDITIONS!!*


by: vkenner

1. beetle tarts

2. marinated

3. shredded

4. simmered

5. creamed


by: Grey Witch

1. Kung Po Beetles! (What can I say? I love Chinese food.)


by: Jessica and Jonathan M.

1. Caramelized Beetle Chutney! (Yum! If that's your sort'a thing.)

2. Beetle Fruit! ( This is from when Lyds made me go on a diet!)

3. Beetle Breakfast (Lyds gave me that idea when she tried guessing my name way back when. Was it really that hard to guess?)

4. Beetle Shakes! (well, it's beetle juice! Okay, beetle milk shakes actually! Well, without the milk, and it has beetles to replace it!)

5. Scrambled Beetles on Gross! (Like scrambled eggs on toast, but it's scrambled beetles smired onto that little poodle pain, Poopsie, across the street! Hey Babes, don't look at me like that! Oh no, the Monster across the street is comin'! Crud!)